Feb 28, 2005

Game…

What is game? People especially guys say things like “He’s got game”, “I’ve got game” with little or no knowledge about what they are talking about. I’ll explain the word game from a philosophical point of view with a concept called Game Theory which is used in social sciences…

Game Theory is “The study of decision problems in competitive situations. Game theory is the procedure for analyzing and deriving rules for making decisions when two or more people or organizations are competing for some objective.”

A summary of this definition show that whenever there is an interaction between people, a game is being played. An economic example of this occurs when a sales manager makes a decision on the price at which to sell a product. In this case the manager is involved in a game between his/her customers and the managers of the other competing manufacturers of similar products. A legal scenario would be a game between the prosecuting and defending lawyers when each decides what arguments to put before the jury and the judge. These games take place between business organizations, militaries and even within governments.

Thus when a boy and a girl are interacting, a “game” is being played… hence that’s where the “He’s got game” phrase is derived, showing he’s got expertise in analyzing and deriving the best rules in making decisions… this concept is used in Morris Chestnut and Vivica Fox’s “Two Can Play That Game” movie. Therefore being a master at a game is not something that is dropped on your laps in a second, neither can it be taught, but IT CAN BE LEARNT (get it)… it took me so long to figure this out… you can’t ask someone to teach you “game”… but you can learn it! How? Through experience! Fair enough you can sit in front of the TV and watch shows or films that teach “game” or read all the books in the world on “dating techniques” at the end of the day, you need to get out into the real world and practice what you’ve learnt and bwoy you’ll see that it’s like being thrown in the lion’s den!!! It requires thinking on your feet based on past experiences!!! With the assumption that people behave rationally which is not quite right, but will suffice as people do not behave irrationally all the time (as the ones that do have become extinct…thanks to Darwin’s “Survival Of The Fittest”. Thus after experiences (like loads)… you can say, if she says this, it means this (in most cases), if she does this, I can get away with this by doing this!!! People often think “game” is having good looks, having money or a nice car… that’s not game, they all assist “game”… game is all in the head, it’s about being able to think fast in a short period of time! There are loads of guys out there who are complete twats with women and also there are guys who haven’t got crap in their bags and they are hit with women… why? It’s all in the GAME!!!

So if you wanna be a game master, get down and dirty and start getting some experiences… don’t be ashamed of rejection (everyone’s being there, I’ve been there enough times)…rejection does not make you a failure…. FEAR OF REJECTION MAKES YOU A FAILURE! And you don’t wanna know where you could be right now if only you’d spoken to that girl you saw the other day! Also don’t try to be someone else! Try out different things and see what works for you, for some it may be being charming and sweet… for some it’s being able to mix being cocky and being funny…!!! It’s a snow ball effect… once you start it just builds up… your confident rockets to next levels!!!

A good tip when trying to improve your confidence, compliments!!! A lot of people especially women are paid to talk to you!!! Think about it, the lady behind the till at your local Sainsburys (the nice one), that girl that works at the perfume store… a little “Your hair looks nice… where did you get it done? My girlfriend’s been moaning about finding a good hair salon…” Just make up some crap… and you’ll be surprised she’ll be willing to talk to you, then talking to women becomes so easy its like chewing gum (you do it with no conscious effort)… try it with your sister’s friends… even your mum’s friends…”Oh… your perfume smells nice…” Okay I’m not asking you to start moving to your mom’s friend… that’s just plain wrong!!!

So guys!!! Give your game a jump start!!! Get in there… and for you ladies… give us guys a break… smile… it makes it easier for us to say “Hi, what’s your name…” and it makes you look twice as nice!!!

DISCLAIMER!!!
I won’t be held liable for any broken hearts because some guy had just improved his game and reckons he can play about and mess up a woman’s emotions!!! Remember real game is a man who can make a woman feel like she’s the most special woman in world to him AND CAN KEEP IT THAT WAY even though that might not be the case!!!

Feb 27, 2005

Louise joined Byron and I at Bar One today… It was fun, having a female there at one of our “male bonding” sessions… and guess who joined us later on… Marie… Louise’s sister… she forgot her keys so had no choice… she’s so funny! Didn’t know beautiful girls could be funny as well… most of they are standoffish… Marie and Louise kept on talking about how much they wanted to see that new film “Coach Carter” I haven’t seen it or anything… but I reckon it’s gonna be like one of those cliché films… boy in a team going off the rails… coach tells him he’s got a lot of potential… and in the dying minutes of the film, there’s a basketball match… and the buzzer goes off to say time up… the ball is in mid-air and everyone’s staring in slow motion…. Then ball goes in and everyone screams…. Boy pledges to basketball team… I might be wrong, but there are like 50 films like that!!! The film I wanna see is Hitch… Will Smith’s new film… a lot of people say it reminds them of me… or maybe it should have co-starred me… hmmm…

I dropped Louise and Marie off and I was cotching there till around 1am!!! Watching “Best Man”… Louise loves that film off!!! Marie was on the phone to her boyfriend!!! (all throughout my stay!!!)… Louise cooked another good meal…. I was getting used to her cooking! She was now a proper friend… sometimes I still find it strange that we had done something in the past… she never mentioned it or brought it up! I told her about my day with Amerie yesterday… “Do you think she likes you?” She asked… “I don’t know you know… she’s a nice person… really friendly…even though she’s like mega-rich” I said… it was cool chatting to her on a level… I think every guy needs that… a girl they can talk to on a level!!!! It’s not always about doing things… friendship counts… she’s not like some girl’s who will undermine any chances you have with another girl because you’ve done something with them in the past….

After watching Best Man, we watched a re-run of last week’s O.C (I love that show!!!)… those shows just make you wanna be in love… or in some relationship and how sweet things can be… I think that’s why girls love those kinda shows… Dawson’s Creek was cool but they were too young to have been going through all those deep situations…. It would have been cool if they were much older….

Left Louise’s house, when I got a text

“Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, you are a very funny person, I don’t understand you, you are the most arrogant, cocky and overconfident guy I’ve ever met! I normally find it off-putting in a guy, but there something about you, I really like you and the more I ask myself, I can’t seem to know why!”

It was Amy…. she hasn’t called me in a while, neither have I…. and I wasn’t going to anytime soon… I can’t stop thinking about Amerie… I wasn’t going to rush anything… not planning to make any physical moves on her….. I want to enjoy Amerie for who she is…..

I want to savour her like sweet fine wine…..

Feb 26, 2005

I got to Amerie’s place around… I hadn’t washed my car for time now because there’s no point, if you wash it today, its dirty in three days time, the weather is really messing things up… but I went to a valet to clean it up before picking her up. I was a bit late… 10 minutes late… didn’t matter because she wasn’t ready… I wasn’t pissed because I reckon women are allowed to be late because they take so much time dressing up… I was waiting in the car though…. She came into the car and I was like going all crazy… we looked so beautiful and her perfume smelt so nice…I could feel myself rise! “Hi” she said as she gave me a quick peck on the chic….oooooOOHHH! Okay guys let me teach you a little something… there are six vital things to notice on a woman to compliment her and she’ll love you for it…. You don’t have to say all six on the same day… (you’ll sound like a twat if you do!)…Okay first things first…her HAIR… make sure it’s the first thing you say when you notice she’s had her hair done… its pretty expensive… and also it’ll be helpful if you could get one of your female friends to teach you how to run your hands through female hair without making a mess of it! Secondly…her WEIGHT… have you lost weight love? And if she’s gained weight…don’t say you look fatter… or have you gained weight…. Tell her you’ve noticed… but she shouldn’t worry because it’s going to the “right places” and you luvin’ it (like McDonalds… I’M LOVING IT… she’s probably been having some of it!)…. Thirdly her CLOTHES… tell her you love it and where she got it from…. Women love it when you appreciate their clothes… because they spend so much time buying it in the first place! Then her HANDBAG, SHOES and EARRINGS!!!! We went to Oxford street… and we went to about almost every shop on the street…. It was fun though, testing out outfits… having hot chocolate together (that’s her favourite drink!!!)… PLUS she linked my arms!!! If a girl can link your arms on Oxford street… then she wouldn’t mind you being her man… because that’s the assumption people make when they see a man and a woman linking arms…especially on Oxford Street… where you cant help but be spotted by someone you know or someone who knows you!!! It’s all good though; at least I got my mum something, even if it was for the wrong reasons…. Got her a nice jacket…. Amerie had enough bags… helped her out as well… plus I got a parking fine!!! Great!!! Amerie offered to pay it but I said it was alright…. “I’m so sorry” she kept on apologizing….. I dropped her at home… “Wanna come in?” She said… wow…is this me bruv???? “Thought you’d never ask” I said… “What? You are funny” She shook her head as she smiled and got out of the car…

Her flat was PHAT!!! People say girls are not into gadgets but she had some massive plasma screen TV… her interior decoration was very contemporary, very modern…. She even had a PlayStation 2!!!! I was impressed… maybe I could actually wifey this girl… She made some hot chocolate for me… (it was freezing out there)… “You’ve got a nice place here….I’m jealous” I said… “Thanks, just have it decorated recently… spent almost ten grand… my dad paid for it though” She said… admiring her flat… “I’m just gonna get changed… want anything?” She said…. “Naa… I have to start going now… my mum’s feeling a bit under the weather…. Have to go see her…” hmmm… that scored me some brownie points…. “You are so sweet aren’t you…you are mummy’s boy aren’t you?” right…right…right… even though I wanted to cotch there for time but I had to make myself scarce… absence makes the heart fonder!!! “Thanks, I had a nice time….” She said as she waved me goodbye….

Sweet init? I got a text from Amerie later that night…

“hey! mommy’s boy, I had a great time today, you are so funny!
goodnite. amerie xxx”

Text her back to say…. “The feeling is mutual…” that’s the great thing about text… you can say one thing that has two different connotations!!!

I’m loving it!!!!!

Feb 25, 2005

Amerie called me today, and you know the first thing that came to my mind when I saw her number? Don’t tell me she’s going to cancel on me… I wouldn’t say Amerie seemed like she was out of my league, she was nice, arrogant kinda nice… so I was quite surprised she phone to ask if we were still on and to make sure I wasn’t going to flake out on her…. HELLO…I WAS THINKING THE SAME!!!! She was really nice on the phone, telling me about how she’s been spending too much on shopping… how she went on a shopping spree last week and spent about £700 in one day… I won’t be surprised… she bought a pair of boots for £300!!! Are you meant to be some sort of footballer’s wife or something… I know she works for some council… “I did some damage to my credit card” She said…. Wow!!! £700… that’s an awful lot… I do shopping as well… but I don’t go shopping this week, then go next week… it’s more of shopping this month and shopping in three months time… She also mentioned going to Barcelona to escape from the awful weather we were experiencing at the moment… I had a quick think what Amerie would look like in a bikini, lying on a beach chair, sipping some orange juice…. Hmm… “Are you going alone?” I asked… “No...silly… who goes to a holiday alone?” She said… err…how am I suppose to know? “So who are you going with…” I finally asked…. “Its my ex-boyfriend… he’s trying to make a come-back… he was out of town during valentine’s day and he’s insisting he takes me on holiday…so…” NOOOOOOO!!!! Actually… its alright… let's see who gets the girl… I’m not gonna give her 101 reasons why she shouldn’t get back with him, in fact I’ll tell her to give him another chance… but with my luvin’ all in her face… I reckon that geezer ain't got a chance… first of all I need to know for how long they were together for? “About eight months…but we kinda grew up together…so its different”… okay…maybe things will be kinda difficult… BUT I COULD DO THIS… the thing is I’ve been in a similar situation where I actually got the girl and I never asked her out…because it wasn’t like I wanted to be with her… it's all about the challenge!!! But Amerie was different… She would make a nice trophy wifey… she was nice looking, dresses nice…. I won’t mind being with her but she’ll definitely be “high maintenance”, in fact TOO HIGH MAINTENANCE…. With her £700 shopping sprees!!! She had rich parents as well…. And she lived in some swanky area of London… W11…HOLLAND PARK… and she’s only 22!!! she stays in a two bedroom flat… it can’t cost any less that half a million!!! But it’s a family house though… and she’s the only child, so I guess you could say it’s her place but her dad paid for it… (guess some of us aren’t that lucky to have mega-rich dads!!!)… I’ll be lucky to get this bird… all I kept on saying was “is it???” while she told me everything!!! Now this is my kinda girl… a girl with a touch of class!!! I wasn’t gonna let this go without a fight!!! “So what time should I pick you up tomorrow…” I asked… quite clever of me… I’ll get to drop her at home… and if I’m lucky, get a tour of her flat… even if I wasn’t lucky to get a ill’ sum’um…. “Errm… three o’clock is cool…” She said… When I came off the phone… I was like yeah… this might be one worth going after!!!! It wasn’t like I needed her money…I had mine… just needed a bit of upward nudging (social stratification) in the class hierarchy… meet a few rich people… and get to go to some fancy parties… hmm…like a pent-house party!!!! Or a pool party…!!! “Hmmm…what I’m I wearing tomorrow?” Raw, this girl got me thinking like a girl now!!!!

Louise came round to my place today…she’d now become my “cotching” buddy… She cooked up some nice meal… damn! This girl could cook… I told her about Amerie… she’s like that’s good for you Kelly…! “So what are you wearing?” Err… is it me or was that strange??? I had a thing with this girl about a week ago… and she’s all cool about it… who was I to her? her “f**k” buddy? … oh well…

that’s cool by me… piece with no drama!!!

Feb 24, 2005

I met up with Byron today at Bar One, talking about the usual things we talk about. One thing that lightened up the day was talking about your most memorable date. Byron had mentioned something about him going on some date (years ago) where he got caught out with a girl in a locker room at the cinema... bare jokes!!! As for Kelly, most memorable date (or should I say best date…???)… would be ….

This happened about a year ago… there was this girl I fancied a lot but never did anything about it… I finally asked her out…. (at this point we’d become really good friends…err that’s what happens when you like a girl and you don’t do nothing about it!)… so we went to this really fancy cinema… We bought the tickets and she went ahead to buy some ice-cream while I went to the toilets… (don’t worry, I washed my hands…)… It then occurred to me that my phones (two) were missing!!! I rushed to counter where we’d purchased the tickets and didn’t find them… I also asked the lady selling the tickets if she’d seen any phones… she said she hadn’t DAMN!!! TWO BLIMEY PHONES MISSING… we looked for the phones in her car (I knew I took the phones out of the car… but when you are looking for something missing… you look in crazy places… err… like in your shoes!)… I never found my phones… I’m like this is my DAMN DREAM DATE!!! I should be getting all cosy with this pretty angel next to me…but here I am looking for my phones!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!! so I came to a conclusion my phones had been stolen… NO!!!!!!!! she was really helpful… she left messages on the phone… (oooOOOHHH… really threatening ones…. not really….) and after some time I just say on the sofa at the cinema and thought… all I asked for was to be with this girl and look at what I getting in return… to make matters worse I’d travelled from the other side of town!!! THEN THE LIGHT BULB WENT ON! (Brilliant idea!)… I looked at the kiosk where the tickets were been sold… I saw the CCTV camera… and I’m like yeah… I’m in business!!! I asked the manager if I could see the tapes… he’s like I have to come back tomorrow… come back tomorrow? I don’t live anywhere near here… he’s like “sorry mate”… after some minutes… he came back and he said he checked and there was nothing on the tapes… I insisted I came with him and after much deliberation, he agreed…. Here’s the good part… I saw the film… I saw my phones sitting on the till (where I’d left them) and some PRICK came and took them (he was with his girlfriend!!!)… put it in his pocket and left the cinema… (probably to put them in his car… SLY BASTARD!!!!)… he game himself away by wearing a dark jumper with a distinctive white line across… (the tapes didn’t help… it was black and white and it had a two second delay!!!) he was kinda dark… so I assumed he was a black man… and he had all stupid designs in his hair!!! TO REMIND YOU… ALL I CAME TO DO WAS BE WITH THIS PRETTY GIRL AND SOME PRICK STOLE MY PHONE!!! The manager was quite helpful and he found out the films they’re (the thief and his girl) watching…. Dumb ass prick was watching Harry Potter…. So I snuck into the screen (the screen wasn’t packed… so I could recognise him easily MAN WAS GETTING ALL COSY WITH HIS GIRL…I’M LIKE THAT SUPPOSE TO BE ME BRUV!!!!…thx to his dumb hair design and his jumper)… I went out and told the manager… but he said I shouldn’t confront him because it was against their policy (some dumb policy about they have obligations to protect their customers)… it wasn’t like I was packing anything to confront him…he could have a knife or better still deny it…or RUN AWAY!!!!... another light bulb lit…. err… CALL THE POLICE!!!! I had no phone… so we used the girl’s phone… and her battery died while we were waiting on the operator (GREAT!!!!)…we then used a payphone…she was on the phone…ON HOLD FOR ABOUT 30MINS!!!! And I was watching out for this guy, in case he came out! AND HE DID COME OUT!!!! But he went to the toilet… it was some black-boy wannabe Asian dude… I was filled with so much rage… I would have rushed him…. (hopefully I should win… provided he didn’t have a gun or knife)… he went back into the screening hall… then the police came like after another 20mins… and I’m like some dude stole my phone… he’s like have you got evidence? I’m like hell yeah!!!! So with the manager, I showed them the “evidence”… and I lead them to the screen where the prick was…. And the police man thought he was James Bond, all sneaking in and having a look… then he went to him and called him out… serves him right public embarrassment!!!.. The police man told him that he’s been accused of stealing two mobile phones… the prat was so confident… he went I didn’t steal nothing… he’s like search me… they search him and found nothing…! Ahh…that’s where you are dumb!!! The police man said…”Let me put it this way, we’ve got CCTV evidence…to show you took the phones….” And what he said next made me wanna punch him red…. He said he didn’t know the phones were mine and was going to return them…. And the police man went to his car to get the phones… I was so happy to get my phones back… the police man asked me if I wanted to press charges… I’m like naa… I just want my phones back… and the disgusting thing he said (the thief) was BLUD (who was he to say blud? You are not even black!!!) YOU KNOW IF YOU WERE IN THE SAME SITUATION YOU’LL HAVE TAKEN THE PHONES AS WELL... “Oh my days… I know you didn’t just say that” That’s when I switched… but the police man held me back.. saying its ok, I should leave him… in case he pressed charges against me for assault…..!

Ahh…what I memorable day… I went out that day… just to be with my love, pretty female friend, who I fancied for TIME!!!…. And I didn’t even get to spend time with her IN THE COMFORT OF THE CINEMA!!! But it was fun… a date that turned into crime solving…. Maybe I could be the first black James Bond!!! Err…maybe not! Plus I have to rate the girl… she was so helpful!!! I don’t think any other girl would have done that… some other girl would have been sitting all pretty saying…”I’m so sorry, I cant believe people can be so callous”… but she put in a 101% to get my phones back…

THAT’S WHAT YOU CALL WIFEY MATERIAL!!!!

Byron then went to have a word with a female friend… some two ladies were chatting in the corner… and one of them caught my eye… and I gave her this look…which said “Err…why are you looking at me?” and she was like what? Byron took forever… and then the one who’d caught my eye looked again and smiled…. I told her to come over… she’s like no…you come over… and I thought.. I’ve got nothing to lose…Byron was taking forever… let me have a chat… So we got talking… and I found out they were both single mothers… about my age as well… and to have some fun… I said I had a baby too…a boy… They were like “Is it? How old is he?” … I had to say something cute… “It was his 1st birthday two weeks ago” They were surprised but didn’t believe me (what does a baby father look like?)… then Byron came over and joined…. And when they asked him (don’t know why they wanted to catch me out) He was tried to lie to cover me up… and I kept on hitting one finger on the table to indicate ONE YEAR OLD but he didn’t catch on… and he said TWO!!! I got caught out… but it was fun, having a chat with them… the one who caught my eye asked for a dance (it was slow jams as well!!!)… but I declined… she was kinda short… and I was tall so it won’t look right… at the end when they were leaving… I’m like how are you girls getting home… she’s like she was driving… I’m like cool!!!! She’s like how are you getting home… by bus??? (were they trying to take the piss?) the other girl must have said…”Have you got a bus pass because a bus ticket now cost £1.20”…. okay it wasn’t funny anymore… but I laughed at their dumb ass jokes…. I’m like I’m driving… she’s like “What car do you drive?” WHY DO WOMEN ALWAYS ASK THAT… I DRIVE I DRIVE….PERIOD!... I’m like does it matter…? She then smiled…. I walked her to her car… it wasn’t no 54REG BLACK GOLF GTi…. As she’d been carrying on…. “oooOOOHHH….I drive…..”… She’s like aren’t you leaving now… I said “err…there’s one more thing I need to do….” She said “what?” I’m like “Get your number….” It sounded quite smooth to me… but she’s like “Naa… I’m off men at the moment… I like you though…” Okay what’s that about??? You like me and you can’t give me your number… fair enough you’ve got a young child who needs all your attention… but I didn’t want anything from her… I reckon it was my delivery…I was trying to be smooth…. I should have used the whole innocent… “nice chatting to you, would like to continue the conversation sometimes” line… DOH!!!

That was today…right now I’m knackered and I need to sleep!!!!

Feb 23, 2005

Something funny happened today, I’ve never experienced being tipsy before (because I’m not a big drinker…), but at work I had a slight experience. We had a presentation with a client and there were a few drinks and slight snacks going around. So I thought… oh free wine ey? I went for red wine (I’m more of a white wine person…don’t know why I went for red today)… I took the first glass… I was a bit thirsty and a gulped a mouthful of the wine… and I thought to myself… “what are you doing Kelly? This isn’t water you know?” I finished the first glass and I went for a second…mid-way through the second glass, I was having a chat with my project manager, who had just introduced me to one of the clients and I had this funny feeling like a horn was being blown into my ears… I’m like crap what’s that… it never occurred to me it could be the wine… after that my head started going all wobbly… I’m like what the monkeys was in this wine? The wine was crap anyway… but I wasn’t feeling my normal self and I kept of smiling at everything she said (project manager)… and I’m like “Why are you smiling Kelly? There’s nothing funny!” It was well weird…

Okay, I was thinking, what is with chics and make-up? I like make-up, the whole concept is good, but I think too many women get carried away with the concept of “make-up”… Make-up is used to enhance beauty and appearance right? Could make-up also be used to “make-up” as in making up for “defects” or not so good features? i.e. bad skin, blackheads, spots? My views on this are quite subjective so I might step on a few toes… I’ll start with what I don’t like… I’m not a big fan of foundation and mascara… if used in prudent and reasonable quantities it can be good but some girls just get carried away… and their faces end up looking so plastic…and you are like….arrggghhhh!!!! (the dude who just saw something awfully frightening)… Also all you want is a hug and you get a good stain of brown powder on your new white shirt or better still on your face! I’m not a fan of lip stick either… lip gloss is so better!!! And the funky colours on the eye lids! Now what I like…. Carefully use of eye shadow is so nice… it accentuates the eyes and makes it look all sultry… arrrggghhhh!!! (the dude who can’t control himself because he’s just seen a beautiful woman)…. Lip gloss is good… especially the fruit flavoured ones that softens and moisturises the lips…. That’s about the kinda make-up I like…. If you’ve got bad skin… make-up is not the way out… let your skin BREATHE!!!! Make sure you take vitamins… Vitamin E is good for your skin…it helps it heal… and clears blackheads…. Also having a facial scrub won’t go amiss…. Or use skin toning products…. This is so unfair… because for men… what you see is what you get….!!! We don’t wear make up, so when you see us on the first day, we look about the same on the next day (excluding those who suffer from the FWD (Fine When Dark) syndrome) I understand make-up is part of dressing up… but keep down… easy and lovely… you are not dressing up to be an extra from a low budget zombie movie…. Don’t forget Kelly likes make-up…. But tone it down…. Natural beauty is good…. Hmm… I should start a campaign for natural beauty in women….

I was at Louise’s place yesterday… nothing happened… but it was fun talking to her and watching TV… she can be very good company… that’s some girl who appreciates my sense of humour…. Plus… my bad singing…. I wish I could sing sometimes…. And make up songs on the fly and sing to a lady…. Plus the perfect gift will be an acoustic guitar… with a little poem inscribed on the back…(maybe a sonnet)…with To Kelly… at the bottom…. That will have been a sweet valentine’s day present… hmm… the lady who does that without me telling her will have to be the one!!! (you know… the One… Like in The Matrix… THE ONE….ooooOOOHHHH)

Feb 22, 2005

Is it me or am I the only one who falls asleep on the phone. After a hard day’s work, I like to spend some time on the phone but the problem is I can’t do a social call anytime before 10pm… if you phone me before then, you won’t get much out of me or better still I’ll ask you to phone me later… peak time is around 11pm-1am… but sometimes I fall asleep on the phone (say b/w 2-3am… its kinda mad because I have to wake up at around 6 to get ready for work)… Trust me I know how jarring it is when someone’s falling asleep on the phone… Claire used to do it and I can’t tell you how annoyed I get… it seems like its contagious and I’ve been doing the same ever since… (don’t worry it doesn’t happen everyday… more like one every two weeks…) I think I need to learn when to say… “Hey luv, I’m really tired I need to go to sleep now…” it’s not so hard is it?

Finally called Amerie, she’d happened to be the best looking one out of the six and thought I should start with the best… she’d been wearing a checked gathered camisole with blue jeans on Saturday, she had spiky short hair (my preference). She was one of those girls who thought they were too nice (she was nice though)… I called her at around 11pm… and she gave me some dumb crap about she’s busy and can I call her back in like 10mins…(NO!!! Not the call me back later line) I did call her back (some minutes after 12)… She was quite pleasant on the phone… I wanted to give her some wit… I asked her what she was doing after work tomorrow… she’s like nothing, she’s like is there something going on? I’m like “Yeah I’m taking you out” Without sparing a second… She said “No you not” That second she said that, I felt like I was a bird that was just shot down in mid-air… I was on a roll and she just stopped me in my tracks… “Is it?” that was the only thing I managed to say…. She’s like “Yeap…” There was a brief silence (damn!!! This hasn’t happened to me for time!!!) … Okay, I’ll talk about her then… “Your hair looked really nice on Saturday… I really like it..” She’s like thanks… and went on about how she used to have long hair but she needed a change… we spoke about hair, ladies fashion… and her job (she worked for some council in some London borough)… afterall, with these kinda girls… it was all about them… If I can remember, she said her interests were shopping, eating out….and err….shopping??? So I decided to join her shopping on Saturday… (came up with some crap about me wanting to buy something for my mum….she bought it…. “Ahhh…that’s so sweet, I’ll help you pick” She said….) … Another tip… find out what tickles her fancy and walk in through that door….

Tried the other numbers…. One kept on going voice mail, two had boyfriends… Anne, the one having a look at the CDs asked me to ring her tomorrow (what does she think this is????... she’ll have to go back to the end of the queue luv), and the last one was so much on it…. “I didn’t even think you were going to ring me” She said… what a bad way to give yourself away…. She was alright in terms of looks… so I won’t dismiss her right now… because on that day when you are feeling lonely and there’s no one to call… trust me she’ll be looking more attractive in your head with every passing lonely moment… so I’ll keep her….

Hmm…. Three positive responses out of six…. Not too bad….

Feb 21, 2005

Monday night… usually a drag… I went to cinema after work to see “In Good Company”… quality film… I thought it was going to be a boring one.. but I loved it, it was deep… and Scarlet Johansson is SO BUFF!!!, she’s so sweet… I’m not going to ruin the film for anyone who hasn’t seen it but all I can say is it’s deep and I spent about 10mins still seating on my seat after the film finished.. thinking about the film and how it applied to me….

Thoughts of Lorraine flooded my mind… Lorraine was the only girl I had been with and couldn’t be with anymore because she had to travel to another country to work… I can remember myself saying “Is this it?” on our last night together…. Even though I felt like sobbing… (I had to be a man… I am not going to cry, I’m meant to be strong)… Lorraine couldn’t help herself but cry…. Which even made me want to do the same… but I held her firmly in my arms…, telling her… I’ll be fine (BIG LIE)… and that she’ll be fine…. The film I saw today brought back those memories…

That reminds me… I need to start calling up some of those numbers I got on Saturday… out of the six… just one of them was my “kind of nice”… but I guess you can’t know too many girls so I’ll call the other five nevertheless….

So if you haven’t seen In Good Company… run to you local cinema and watch it!!! And if you were wondering who Kelly went to the cinema with yesterday… I went alone…. It was nice… treating myself to a tub of ice-cream and popcorn… don’t mind what anyone tells you GOING TO THE CINEMA ALONE IS HEAVY!!!! IT SHOWS YOU DON’T NEED ANYONE TO HAVE A NICE TIME!!!

Feb 20, 2005

Sunday!!! Today was different… we had a little reunion, “the boys” (more like “The Brothers”)… It was Byron, Michael, Mark and I.

Okay a brief introduction… Mark is the fourth in the pack. Mark is 23, good looking, charming… all the ladies man malarkey… he also had money. Mark worked in media for some magazine company… one of the glossy elite ones… There was no denying it Mark was a ladies man… if you went to a party with Mark, there will be at least one girl who liked Mark, without him saying in word… and in most cases…. It wasn’t a minging girl. As far as I could remember, everyone of “the brothers” has lost a girl to Mark. Mark is one of the lucky ones… the ones who were born with charm (some of us had to work on our “game” and develop our charm but Mark was different)… Mark was very eloquent with words which made all the girls all wide-eyed…. Like “is it???” (if you know what I mean)… he had wit as well (something he had in common with me… alongside with good looks, money and all the good stuff)…

I’ll start with me… I went to a party with Mark… and I was having a good time with this girl… when Mark just came out of nowhere and joined in the conversation… it was nice having him there, since I was just cracking jokes with this girl… even though the thought of getting her number was on my mind… but I reckoned I could leave that till later… that was when Mark said “Can I have your number?”… and I’m like ???? What’s going on… I didn’t say anything… because that was my boy? This wasn’t any competition... (which was a regular game “the brothers” happened to play…? ) … like you would have guessed he gave the girl his number… she rang him days later… he did what he had to… and I was like “Raw… that could have been me bruv!”…..

Next was Michael… Michael had met this girl, and he was doing things with her… Mark had suggested he wanted a piece of the pie as well… Michael reluctantly gave Mark the girl’s number… thinking Mark could have some and he could keep on getting his “thing” as well… Mark started meeting up with this girl and lets put it this way… this girl never picked up any of Michael’s call since meeting Mark… but the good thing is… there was no beef… Beef is not tolerated in the circle of the brothers… your girlfriend… could be tested…by any member of “the brothers”… its up to her to pass the test… if she failed... it’s all good… we don’t tolerate unfaithful partners!!!

Byron’s case is the funniest!!! Because it happened today!!! Byron and I went on a double date with this girl and her friend… (about 4 years ago… we were both 18 then…) Byron was into this girl but she wasn’t showing him anything… when the date ended… we walked the girls to the bus stop… (it was freezing cold as well).. we were still having a laugh, when the girl Byron liked… called some boy (apparently) to come pick her up!!!! (I MEAN???!!!) … before the boy got there… Byron asked for her number… and she gave it to him on her terms “AS FRIENDS” she said…. And Byron never phoned her even though he liked her off…. Anyway… four years on… Mark saw this same girl when we were all together… Byron couldn’t say crap!!! (don’t ask me why)…. But Mark went up to this girl and guess what he said… “Here’s my number… call me tonight” AND LIKE YOU’D NEVER HAVE GUESSED, THIS GIRL RANG HIM THAT SAME NIGHT…..SUNDAY NIGHT!!!! I couldn’t stop screaming/laughing… this was a joke!!!! It wasn’t like Mark had waved a bunch of £50 notes in her face or was wearing Gucci clothing from head to toe…. He was just normal Mark having a laugh… I couldn’t tell if Byron was pissed or was indifferent… but it was funny… we couldn’t stop laughing…

We spent about the whole evening, talking and catching up… it was fun…..

Feb 19, 2005

Today was nice... man on a mission. I changed my mind about Lisa, couldn't be bothered about the whole revenge mission, the resulting drama won't be worth it.. so I thought I should let it rest for the time being. For now, I need to recruit more people, the three I had right now were stressing me out. I am holding Tracy at bay, mess around with your man; you'll come back in a matter of time. Amy doesn't phone me anymore because she reckons I'm long... and Louise is just being a nut case.

I had a party to go to with Byron and he'd been carry on about getting there fashionably late... but I knew what I wanted to get out of this party... I needed new girls... and my target was at least five numbers... it'd only occurred to me that if you leave a party with just one number (which is alright), you might encounter certain mishaps... i.e. she gave you a wrong number, she's got a boyfriend, she doesn't like you like that, she just wants to be friend, she's not really your type or worse still she gives you that "I'm busy right now... can you call me back later"... when she says that... you should know you've got loads of work to do... or you might as well just give up at that point.. (Although there are anomalies to this case... where she is genuinely busy)

Anyway I told Byron I’d meet him at the party… I went early, when the party was actually meant to start (8pm)… there’s a saying which says “The early bird gets the best worm”… It was a house party… I knew the female host on an acquaintance level… there were only three people there (including the host)… I ruled out the host because I already had her number and wasn’t my type anyway… one of the other girls was helping the host out in the kitchen and the other was having a look at the host’s CD collection… which was my forte… “Having a hard time picking the right one?” I said as I stood next over her squatted pose… “Not really…” She smiled nervously… was it my good looks or just my height? I’ll opt for the first… “Let me have a look…” I took some CDs from her and had a quick look scanning what artistes where in the collection… we had a brief conversation… about music and our interests in music…her name was Anne… she wasn’t all that but would do… you can’t know too many girls and every “not so buff” girl has a buff friend… so you never know… people started arriving… and I kept on doing the same… having bits and bobs of conversations with random girls… (each lasting about 3mins…then I’ll tell them I had to speak to someone)… at the end of the night, I had spoken to ten girls… and got six phone numbers…. Hmmm… I’ll be having a busy week next week ey? Byron got there really late when I had done my dirty work… so we had a drink and spoke ogling at every bum that seemed to pass us by (female bum that is)… some of the girls I had spoken to smiled as they walked past or said something… and Byron would be like “Where do you know her from?”… I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be telling Byron my strategies… so I just said… just a friend…

So guys… a quick tip… getting to a party fashionably late is good… but if you looking to get numbers… (get a good early pick… getting there early is not so bad)… when you do speak to the girls… don’t “hit” on them… talk to them like they are your mom’s friend or an old friend… no sexual connotations in conversations… just talk like you getting to know them… spend less than 5mins and move on to something else… when the girl sees you talking to another girl, she thinks you are popular and assumes you know the other girl (since you body language is not screaming… I wanna get with you)… that will make her ask her girlfriends… “who’s that guy?” the more girls look at you… the more girls that will wanna know you…. And also… wear a good cologne… or better still.. I recommend… Brut splash-on lotion… it tones your skin and has that distinctive Brut smell… also apply on cologne to your ears… so when she leans in to say something into your ears… she can smell that wonderful scent on you (which will make her remember you)….

Six numbers out of ten… not that bad…. Hmm…

Ps… getting the number… when you wanna get a number… don’t suggest that you like them and wanna get to know them… don’t suggest you wanna be friends… because that sucks… since you’ve spoken to them like twice or three times at the party… just say it was nice speaking to them and ask if you could call them sometimes… DON’T SAY CAN I HAVE YOUR NUMBER???? SAY CAN I CALL YOU SOMETIMES!!!!!!!!!!!

Feb 18, 2005

I can't keep up with this crap no more!, it's turning into a full time job keeping up with this girls! Louise's been calling about 3 times a day!!! (maybe it't not too much for some... but for me it's driving me nuts...!)

Amy on the other hand is chatting some malarkey about me not being serious and commited to her... HELLO!!!! I AM NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND!!!... ain't the brownsugar you getting not good enough? Maybe I need a break... tell all these girls to go away and concentrate on what I really want! But before I do that I need to deal with Lisa... she's coming round tomorrow (he!he!)... I've got this all sussed out... inject her with some brownsugar... she knows she's been missing that good luvin'... that's why she's coming back... and I need to deal with that guy called Joe as well... I need the 411 on him, know what girl he really cares about... then go in for the kill! If he thinks he's the king of relationship wreckers... meet your superior... I'm a good guy.. I hope you can see this.. but if you step on my tail, you've got something else coming to you...

Tracy wants to be acting like she's the first girl to have a boyfriend... try tell me no more luvin'... I ain't giving up... I'm taking her off that boyfriend of hers... you probably think I'm wasting these women's time and lives... no I'm not... I'm just making sure I make the right choice... and if they are patient enough... maybe they'll be settling down with the man of their dreams... Kelly... you heard me right... KELLY!!!

This reminds me of Tank's song One man (I love this song!)

"A walk in the park...or late night TV...i’m a kind of simple man ...I need you to understand" ...
"Girl, I’m only one man...Doin’ what I can...To give you everything you need ...To be everything that I can be "

All these women have to do is understand... I'm all they want, all they need... and all they have to do is be patient till I realise that lucky one, is all I want... and all I need....

It's so simple.... I'm not a player... I'm just making sure I get Miss Right wihtout wasting time... dating women in series is LONG!... I'm doing it in parallel, simultaneously and concurrently so as not to waste my time...

...because Kelly ain't getting younger!!!!!

Feb 17, 2005

First stop, last night I went to Louise's house to get that stupid thought of her getting back with her ex out of her head... I mean why would you wanna get back with you ex when I'm here (don't be silly Louise). I got to her house and gave her some good luvin', you know the luvin' you get that leaves you numb, the one that flings you into ecstacy... I was a man on a mission... She didn't want me to leave but I had to before all those talks about what happens next crept in... It is said that the difference between lovers and f**kers is what they do after a session of "luvin'"... the lovers cuddle up after and talk about stuff... but the latter are out of the room in a second going their separate ways... I wasn't going to bugger Louise down with some false promises about us, but I was sure my luvin' was good enough to keep her sitting good in her position waiting for her next dose of brownsugar... its reverse logic but the cure for brownsugaritis is brownsugar... and symptoms include brownsugarphilia (unexplained love of brownsugar)...

...Like Louise wasn't enough, Tracy's also chatting some crap about getting with some guy she met the other day...??? In all fairness to them, I gave them no commitment (They weren't my girlfriends and I wasn't their boyfriend... I'm a honest bloke.. that must count for something!)... In fact she wasn't contemplating getting with him, she had got with him!!! so she's saying luvin' is not an issue open to discussion... we'll see... once there is brownsugar in your blood... you've got brownsugaritis, and the only cure is brownsugar... so it's all a matter of time before the symptoms kick in and you'll come to the DADDY!!!!!

...Amy on the other hand...ain't talking to me... says I'm too busy for her and I don't create enough time for her... (HELLO!!! i'm not your boyfriend!!!!)... it's like I'm going through a little woman crisis... but balance will be gained at all cost.....

AT ALL COST!!!!!!!!

Feb 16, 2005

Some once said, when you are involved in a fight, whatever you do, don't fall to the ground, because not only have you lost the fight, your opponent is in the perfect position to give you a proper pounding (stumping your head away). Lisa has fallen flat to the groud, inasmuch as I hate to say this, I the opponent is standing right over her and in some good position to give her some good kicking on the floor... NO ONE MESSES WITH KELLY!!! It's bad enough you left me for some next man, but you, now realizing it was a mistake, you deserved a good kicking on the floor.

I had a strategy, I was going to take her back... act like it was all my fault, without letting her know Kate had given me the 411 on her sitaution. I was going to give her the whole R Kelly's "Heart of a Woman"... Donell Jones' "Where you Are...Is where I Wanna Be"... the whole I'm so sorry, it's my fault and I'm ready to do this right... come to think about it... I never got the break up luvin' (as they say)... at least I can get to make love to her for the last time... (actually I could make this an on going thing... hmmm.. I'm so sinister... but what's a brother to do? walk away like a dickhead? eerrr....NA!!!)... I would tell her, we should work at things... but take things slow, how I've spent the last few days thinking about how much I valued her... (which I kinda did!!!), defiantely get a lil' sum'um first day, second day... and at some point ask her what she'd been doing when we "broke up"... see if she tells the truth... if she does... tell her its over... (THEN I'LL BE THE ONE WHO IS SMILING!!!)... if she doesn't tell the truth... gives me more time to fool around with her... then when I'm bored... I'll tell her I uncovered the truth... and BLAM!!! SHE'S DUMPED LIKE LAST NIGHT'S FRIES!!! If Lisa thought she could play mind games with me.... then is she wrong or what???

Now the plan... invite her over for dinner at my place... have the whole candle light malarkey thing going on... play some slow jams...hmmm... "the I'm sorry ones..." (I've got slow jams for every occasion), deliver the spiel and the sweet talk... get a lil' sum'um... that should get things going... and I'll see what happens over the course of the next few days.....

HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH......!!!! (the laugh an evil scientist.... a buff one)

..Louise called me last night, chatting some malarkey about her ex being back on the scene and how he wants to make things right, and she's thinking about taking him back... is that the sound of one of Kelly's girls leaving... naaa.... I'm not giving up without a fight...

Feb 15, 2005

Hmm... guess valentine's day is all a big hype, it has come and gone and I've saved some money! plus I got the biggest valentine's day present! The reason to why Lisa left me for another man!!! Guess when you want something, all you have to do is sit back and relax (and drink yourself to crap!!!) The girl who'd come up to me on friday night was Kate!!! She said she'd seen me looking really bad and thought I deserved an explanation into what actually happened behind the scene... you won't believe it... beneath my relationship with Lisa was a huge can of worms

The other guy was some guy called Joe who Lisa had liked some time ago before she met me (although Joe never displayed any sign of affection towards her), but nothing happened between them. Lisa started going on with me and kinda forgot about Joe. Then she met Joe a week weeks into our relationship. Joe had shown some interest in her and had taken her number. Joe started telling Lisa how he felt about her (truth or lies... I dont know) and all those feelings Lisa had for him came up again. They met up once and had been physical (even though Kate said, they didn't have sex... which means Lisa lied to JENNY!!! how dare you Lisa!?). Although Lisa had done something with Joe, she informed Joe, she really like her boyfriend and felt she had betrayed him (DAMN RIGHT!) even though I wasn't being there for her but she felt bad and she said she was going to have to tell her boyfriend what she had done, and she was ready to face the repercussions. Joe then told her to make a choice between him and Kelly(me). Lisa who thought it was a no win situation with me because she knew I'd leave her if I found out and if she stayed with me, she won't be happy in the relationship, then went ahead and chose Joe (What a cheek!!!). Apparently Joe knew who I was, and was the one giving Lisa the 411 on what her "lovely" boyfriend was up to.

That was the bad part... the good part is Joe was just looking out for himself, and after he had slept with Lisa, had become estranged and had left her. Lisa is now feeling so bad and doesn't know to explain all this to me. The reason Kate could locate me was because Lisa had mentioned some party which she was meant to come to with me.

SEE!!!! afterall I was the "relatively" good guy... I cared about Lisa, but she was too blind to see that because of the malarkey Joe was feeding her. Women!, always remember the grass is not always greener on the other side... which reminds me of Marques Houston's song... "Grass is greener"....

"Tell me where the hell you got the nerves, coming back asking for a second chance... after you left me alone for the next man?" "Should have thought about it before you said goodbye.. the same thing that makes you laugh can make you cry"...

Feb 14, 2005

Valentines Day!!!

Today sucks!!!, the normal Kelly should be out there right now making some woman feel so special by taking her out to some fancy resturant and lavished her with some red roses, wine and a little love gift, but here I am, so knackered after a hard day's work. Most people were doing something, and tales about tonight's plans flooded my ears from fellow colleagues. Guess I was doing my wallet some good afterall, I would have spent a well earned £500 on a day like this.

Took time out to think about what was going on... I'm not a player, but many people may think I am, it's not like I'm telling women, I love them and they are the only one for me or the only woman in my life am I? I'm not asking to be their boyfriends am I? All I want is someone to have fun with... maybe fun is an ambiguous word but all I want is to spend time, talk, laugh and if that involves an odd kiss at the end, is that too much to ask for? I may like a girl and tell her, but does that mean I'm telling her I wanna take things further to the next level? Maybe the word like is ambiguous as well... maybe the right phrase is I'm sexually attracted to you, I want to spend time with you and get to know you AND this does not stop me from feeling the same way about many other girls...

This analogy sounds bad, but it better describes the situation. I reckon people are like computers, if you buy one today for £500, in three months time, I can bet you, you'll find a newer computer for the same price, with better features. Therefore it won't be prudent if you paid cash down and left with a computer and it wont be smart not to buy a computer until you find the best one, because they'll always be better one come a few months time for the same price. That's why in good stores... they say to you, if you buy a product and you find the same product somewhere else with a lesser price, we'll match that price, or you can return it... NOTE: GOOD STORES!!! Therefore, when Lisa left me for some next man, I wasn't mad at her, I was mad at the fact that some other man could match my price (which to Lisa was crap....oh well)... so if your man is about to leave you... dont be mad at him, talk to him and find out why he wants to leave... if you can't match the other woman's price, then gladly let him go... and move on... it's his loss... vice versa for men... if you girl leaves you... try and match or gladly move on.... and for those who aren't official yet... you've given a free trial and they didn't like it or weren't convinced/impressed...thus...gladly move on...and improve on your USP!!! make yourself better than you competitors!

Also a quick review of the girls I had right now:

Amy: Such a nice personality, damn pretty as well. Unlike other girls, hasn't got much baggage, something I could erase completely very easily. Looks: 9/10, Wifey material: 8/10, compatibility with Kelly: 5/10, Snazziness: 6/10

Tracy: Kinda weird, her game is quite weak. Seems a bit clingy, maybe its because she made the first move by telling her friend she likes me. Too much baggage. Looks: 7/10, Wifey material: 2/10, compatibility with Kelly: 3/10, Snazziness: 2/10.

Louise: Good friend, very open and friendly. Looks: 5/10, Wifey material: 9/10, compatibility with Kelly: 7/10, Snazziness: 9/10.

Errm... not much of a choice... wish I could mix and match... I'll choose a mix between Amy and Louise... and a drop of Claire's earlier magic and Lorraine's personality! These three are no match to neither Claire nor Lorraine... not anywhere near...

Am I confused or what? looks like my perfect woman is always gonna be in my head.

Feb 13, 2005

I had to get myself out of the house tonight, yesterday had been an utter waste!!! I can't let myself go! All because of a girl, I'm meant to be the daddy!!!

I met up with Byron in the evening at Bar One. He couldn't stop telling me about how he got lucky yesterday. "Is that why you left me yesterday? I had to catch a cab and picked up my car this morning!" I said... drinking my orange juice (no more drinking, I had work the next day as well)... "It wasn't like that, you looked really bad yesterday... all hammered... and falling asleep at a party... come on Kelly... it's not Lisa is it?" I dont know if he was concerned or taking the piss, "It's not her... I just feel violated, some other guy took my girl!!! and she was playing the good girl all along, saying we should spend time apart!!!" ... "Have you spoken to her yet?" Byron asked. "It's not about calling her... she can go off with some next man, it doesn't bother me, what bothers me is the fact that some next man took my girl" I said thinking about how the night had unfolded. "Tracy was meant to come over last night, but I told her I wasn't feeling good" I said... "Is it!!! really that bad ey?"... "Guess so... what are you doing tomorrow?" I asked... "Nothing...you know... you?" Is that a joke or what?... what am I doing? It wasn't like I had no one to ask out...but no one was special enough for me to ask out on Valentines day... maybe some other day... "Errmm... working late?" I said... "Seen..." Byron smiled as we both downed the rest of the drinks in our glasses in silence... guess at that point we could both see the state of our love life... NON-EXISTENT!!!... I had a quick flash back about my times with Claire... with Lorraine, those were the times I shared my life with someone... and they did equally, didn't have to think about no one else apart from the one you cared about... Claire had been the last time I had butterflies when I thought about spending time with her... Lorraine was a greater level of intimacy... we talked and shared thoughts... it was with her I understood the word "intimacy"... intimacy isn't about getting physical, it's about connecting emotionally...not physically... I liked Lorraine... she gave me hope in relationships after my last failed one... which she made a mess of after the relatiohsip ended... at that point I just wanted to make up for all the lost time....

Byron and I left the bar to some girl's house, who was having a little get-together... nothing special... just a way to wrap up another crappy day...

Feb 12, 2005

Woke up really tired this morning, got home at six in the morning!!!

The party was banging, there were loads of people, the sexes were equally represented, which was fine by me. I had told Byron everything that happened the previous day, and he just couldn't stop laughing (which wasn't helping) "I told you, you would get busted" He laughed. I wish I could say I wasn't bothered but I knew I felt like crap with the fact some guy took my girl off me... all the slow jams I was listening to the other night weren't helping either.
We got to the party, and we were directed to the VIP section, where Michael had been sitting comfortably with his girlfriend, who was looking so beautiful (if she wasn't Michael's, I would be on her like a bag of rashes). There were enough girls in the VIP section, so company wasn't an issue. All the girls in there didn't tickle my fancy, all I wanted right now was my Lisa back. I wasn't in the mood to flirt with no one... some girl had come to me to have a chat, but really couldn't be bothered, I was already getting hammered with the drink (trust me when you all sitting at a party talking to no one, you'll lose count of the number of glasses you've had...), She muttered something about seeing me somewhere before and asking if I know someone... Can't even remember what her face looked like, but I gave her my number and asked her to give me a call sometime during the week. I could see Byron in the corner of the room trying to work his magic, he better not try leave me here, because there was no way I was driving home in this state.

I was mad at myself because I never took advantage of such a good party.. all I was doing was doing sitting on the sofa, drinking and almost falling asleep, when there was a bevy of ladies right in front of me, who were waiting for a "baller" to say a lil' sum'um to them. Michael had come right next to me "What's wrong with you K?" He said slapping my arm "Woman problems ey? Byron told me Lisa dumped you" He laughed... "She didn't dump me, we are spending time apart" I said, eyes half closed... "While she's with some next man?" He laughed again... this wasn't helping.... "Look at all the girls here man, try talk to one... and forget by this Lisa girl, trust me she's nice and all but it's not worth you beating yourself up about it" He said... "I take it you are spending Valentines on your own...?" He added... "Errm....I guess so... I'll work late... so it won't matter... what are you doing?" I asked... "I going to St. Lucia with her on sunday... just a lil' birthday present for her" Michael said looking at his girlfriend, who was chirping away with one of her girlfriends. I remember him talking about their relationship, his car garage... his new car... but right now I can't remember anything he said in detail.
Like you'd have guessed, I had to catch a cab home, because I fell asleep... (dont ask me how)... Byron probably said bye... and I woke up five o'clock in the evening. Tracy was meant to come over around eight o'clock... and to be honest I wasn't in the mood for nothing... so I called her to tell her I wasn't feeling too good, and we should try another day, I could hear her disappointed tone over the phone and she'd said something about it being alright (guys, never do that to a girl, she was probably psyched up about tonight already, maybe she'd bought some lucky draws or something... oh well)... I can't believe Lisa was doing this to me... I dont think it was Lisa, its the fact that a girl left me for some other guy...
I had something to drink... and went back to bed... listening to my slow jams.... (it wasn't helping but I left it running....)

What a way to waste a day

Feb 11, 2005

Finally, its the weekend! , got a busy one coming up, from Friday till Sunday. Lisa still hasn't phoned me yet.. ran away with next man..I MEAN!!! (that could be her brother though... RIGHT....!). Wonder what that prat fed her.... lines from Joe's "All the things your man won't do"? "Good girls"? "Dont wanna be a player" not to talk of Dru Hill's "I should be"... I've listened to so many slow jams... it's become a part of me... Maybe what goes around comes around... I have to admit I've done things with girl's who had manz, but I never asked them to leave their boyfriends...!!!

I was so bored last night (and to stop me thinking about Lisa), I went to see Louise who was watching "Best Man" for the 50th time... (that's well sad)... She looked cute in her night t-shirt, all cuddled up to a throw pillow eating some ice-cream... "I love this part" referring to the end when Morris Chestnut couldn't help himself but cry when saying his vows... (Another sad guy)... Louise had now become a friend (I didn't see her that way anymore... maybe the other night just wasn't good enough)... we talked for quite a while until her sister got in (she lives with her sister.. who was 20), OH MY DAYS.... her sister is so buff, I wouldn't have imagined they were sisters. My eyes had suddenly brightened when she walked in, and she said hi, after the intial introduction...her name was Marie... "I've heard a lot about you Kelly" She said... Kelly? that's so intimate, calling me by my first name during our first meeting... That was when some guy walked in... guessed as much, girls like Marie dont come around single. It was more fun than I thought... us four talking and having fun... I left Louise's place some minutes past twelve... Still had thought's of Marie's pretty face loitering in my mind... I won't mind stealing her off her boyfriend... they seemed happy though, all cuddled up on the sofa, giggling... "She's meant to be mine" I thought in my head... I wondered what would have happened if I suggested the game "Truth or Dare" and dared Marie to be my girlfriend... I would have left with a big grin on my face...

Seeing Michael tonight, he's my other boy from time. If there was anything that gave Michael satisfaction from life, it had to be cars and women (in that order). He was well into his kitted cars... and owns a body kits garage... (he's only 25 as well). If your car's got a problem, Michael is your first call. He's motto was "Show me your car and I'll tell you how many birds you can pull in a night" (and he wasn't talking about the kinda birds that hang out on trees). It was his girlfriend's 21st birthday party I was going to tonight, and as you can bet, it's one of those parties where you see all sorts of cars outside ranging from Mercs, Beemas... and even the odd Mini, it was all about appearances. Too bad Lisa ain't with me tonight, I always love having a girl next to me at these occasions... show off your car... and your lady... Lisa would probably have been wearing the short green dress I bought her for Christmas... (oh well, she's gone now... so I'll probably be going with Byron...)

Feb 10, 2005

Lisa spent last night at my place, and I can't tell you how many times I felt the urge to ask her what friend she was with yesterday... I guess every guy is allowed to be curious about what their girlfriend's been up to, but I had to restrain myself from the green eyed monster (jealously). "Kate reckons your friend is good looking, but too bad he's got a girlfriend" Lisa said out of the blue. What is this all about... is this some game or is it for real? "Is it?" I said as I continued to stroke her hair gently, while we watched the TV together. "She wants you to introduce her to him..." Now she was pushing it... "Is there something you wanna say to me Lisa?" I refrained from the cuddle pose and looked her in the eye... "What do you mean..." She smiled... "I know you playing some silly games... I was with a girl there last night, and I lied about not being Lisa's boyfriend... and do you wanna know why?" I noticed I was now raising my voice... "Why?" I was surprised she asked me... afterall, the whole thing was a setup. "Because I've had doubts about our relationship, I've been seeing a few girls but at the end of the day, no one out there makes me feel the way you do... can't you see Lisa...?" I should be in drama school, that was a good line... "I know I haven't been much of a boyfriend to you, but there are things I need to sort out with myself, and I need you to stay by me...Dont listen to what people say about me, they don't know about, you and me... put it out of your mind, because its jealousy... I want you Lisa, why is it so hard to see..." I was getting good at this, just stole a line (or two) from Jon B's "They dont know"... "I'm sorry Kelly... sometimes I just can't help but to see things the other way... I love you Kelly...." She said as she embraced me... I LOVE YOU KELLY!!!! NOW YOU ARE GONNA GET DUMPED!!! I aint ready for no girl telling me about her loving me... because I dont wanna be the one to break no one's heart.... ermm...was I meant to say I love you to her as well?
"I don't wanna lose you Lisa" I guess that'll do... and I couldn't help but to smile to myself and say... "Good boy..." Talking about risk management... I did like Lisa though, I didn't wanna lose her... not yet anyway... "Maybe we should spend some time apart, for the time being" She eventually muttered... WHAT!!!!!!!????????? That's another way of saying It's over!!! "Maybe you should take time out and sort your issues out, then we can make this work..." She added... Despite my lil' performance... she was still "dumping" me in effect.... I DON'T HAVE ANY ISSUES!!!! I WAS LYING!!!! "Is this it?" I said... too bad she was in my house, I couldn't make a grand gesture like picking up my jacket... and leaving... actually I could... I picked up my car keys... walked out of the room.... got my jacket and headed for the door... "I'm sorry..." She said from the sitting room... her words seemed jumbled... like she was sobbing... I opened the door and headed for my car... just when I saw a guy in a car from the corner of my eye... He seemed to look at me and back at the house... I sat in my car... and I could see him... and he had what seemed like a hands-free headset attached to his ears and he was looking at the house... "Who is the guy...?" I picked up my phone and dialled Lisa's number.... she didn't answer the call... I rang again... she didn't pick up.... I certainly wasn't the jealous type... but being played for a fool was something that got me mad... I got out of the car... and I noticed the guy in the car seemed to utter something quickly, while avoiding eye contact... I opened up the door and Lisa now had her jacket on, like she was ready to leave... "Where are you going?" I said... I was angry but tried my best to hide it.... "Home...?" She answered... "How are you getting home... its late..." "I'll get a cab..." She said... "Okay then"... I made my way to the door, she pulled me back and kissed me on the lips.... What was that about... the kiss of betrayal??? I got in my car and zoomed off... only to stop around the corner... made my way to a vantage position where I could see the car the guy had been in... She eventually got inside the guy's car... and the guy drove off... DAMN!!! I was played like a MOFO!!! I couldn't believe I was doing this dodge and hide crap...!

Okay... I had lost in my own game... She had to have a good reason, for leaving with the other guy... at the end of the day, she'll be back, no one can love you like I do... and just for my pride... I had to get her back... indirectly... maybe I'd been naughty messing about with other girls... but no one does the same to me... Lisa's my girl...MY GIRL...! and who's this other dude anyway? he's probably doing the same thing... messing about...

I wanted to call her and tell her I knew what she was up to.... but it wasn't worth it... I had to be a man about this... not some insecure prat!!! She'd put on a spectacular performance, so did I... but her's was grand! looks like she'd planned this whole thing... and nothing was going to change her mind... all the other girls didn't matter right now... just Lisa did... hundred sheep... one has gone astray... leave the other ninety-nine and go for that missing one... that was my game plan...

"GET YOU GIRL BACK".... the inner Kelly screamed!!!

Feb 9, 2005

I was at Bar One yesterday with Amy, and I have to admit it, this girl is BUFF!!! every man in the bar was like what??? you some lucky bloke to have this woman next to you. She was wearing a green strappy camisole top, some tight blue jeans and blue cross front sandals... this girl could dress as well!!! (just the way I like my women... dress sense is number one priority... if you are buff + can't dress = butters!), she held my arm in a link...(ohhh... I didn't mind that because of the men in the bar were hating... GO ON BURN WITH ENVY... HA! HA! HA!)... I had just settled down after getting the drinks from the bar... when I got a call from Lisa... she said she was dropping by Bar One... (apparently she saw my car outside, so she was coming in to say hello!!!)...SHIT!!! SHIT!!! SHIT!!! I had to think fast!!! I took Amy's hand and led her to the VIP suite (I'd become a regular at the Bar, I was classed as a VIP... lol... the guys at the Bar had become more or less friends, so they let me in... "Just a lil' special place for a special lady like you..." I said as I gestured her to sit on the sofa which was well situated in a dark corner of the room... "I'll be back in a minute" I kissed her on the cheek. I had just entered into the main lounge when Lisa walked through the door... "Hey babe y'alright?" I said as I hugged her. "I'm cool, you?" She looked in a hurry... "I'm good love... you look in a hurry..." "Yeah, a friend is waiting outside for me, and I wanted to ask if you could give this key to my friend who'll be coming to get it off you at around 10pm, her name is Kate, I'm staying with her at the moment...Thanks" She kissed me on the cheek before I got the chance to ask any further questions... Lisa never told me she was now staying with a friend, plus who's the friend waiting outside for her.. I was tempted to follow her outside to check, but I decided against it... Kelly ain't insecure... Amy asked what took me so long... "Err.. I had to make a quick call..." I said.. (looks like every statement I utter now is a lie... I hate this lifestyle) "But your phone is here?" She held up my mobile phone... "Err... call... its this term we use at Bar One to make a booking at the VIP section" Did that make sense??? I thought... I reckon she bought it.... We sat there and talked till around 10:30pm... Some girl must have walked into the section and walked directly to where I was.... "Are you Lisa's boyfriend...?" She asked... She looked prety with a belted wrap cardigan... What??? Lisa's boyfriend... this must be Kate... "No, he just left actually, I'm his friend... he said I should give this to some Cathy...Katie???" I was getting good at this... "Kate" She said politely as she shot Amy's hand a glance, which was resting neatly on my lap... I swear that wasn't there a second ago... "Some nice cardigan you have on there..." I said as I gave her the keys "Thanks..." She smiled as she left. "You get bare girls on you don't you....?" Amy asked... "I guess... I'm not a ladies man or nothing like that..."... "I bet you do... did you see Kate's or whatever her name is, body language?" To be honest, I did notice... "No, not at all... anyway..." I changed the subject as quickly as I could. It's a test... if you linger on and ask questions... then it shows you don't get the attention, but if you dismiss it quick, it shows you are used to being asked stuff like that.

I dropped Amy off... "Marsha's working late tonight... wanna come in?" She suggested "...hmmm... trust me, I wanna be in there right now... but I've got work early tomorrow morning..." I had to give her my brownsugar in doses... and plus I ain't that cheap anyway... "Is it... phone me tonight.... .yeah..." She said as she walked away... I drove off thinking what tonight was all about.... when Kate walked into the bar, she would have asked the barman for some guy called Kelly (Lisa would have told her I'm known at the bar)... how come, when she walked in... she never asked... "Are you Kelly?"... how come she said "Are you Lisa's boyfriend..." Was this coincedence or is someone's playing a little game? Did Lisa know I was there with company or was it just a fluke she was passing by and saw my car? Was Kate doing Lisa's dirty job...? If it was a game... then I was the loser, because I've just denied Lisa being my girlfriend..(obviously Lisa must have described her boyfriend to Kate...) I'm so dumped....

As a pre-emtive strike I'd texted Lisa to tell her, I was so sorry and I'd left the keys to my friend to give it to Kate because I had to leave the bar early... Kate would probably get the timing wrong and it'll look like I sent the text before Kate walked in...

Feb 8, 2005

Knackered!!! Thats what I am right now. Just finished played five-a-side footie (getting some exercise ey?)

Being doing some thinking... I've been a naughty boy lately... Amy, Tracy, Louise...??? at the end of the day what I've I gained? Nothing... nothing at all... all at the expense of my girlfriend Lisa. To be frank, there are only two girls I've really liked... Claire and Lorraine... Wonder where those two are now anyway...? Maybe I should give up these "play boy" lifestyle and open my heart to that one lucky lady... but the thing is I've done it once and at the end of the day... to what avail? Lisa tells me I don't open up to her all the time, but what is there to talk about? I rather keep my business to myself....

The thought of Lisa seeing some other guy also gives me the creeps... I'm not the type to pick up the phone and telling this other guy to stop talking to my girl (Ain't that insecure... if she wants to leave the door was open). At the end of the day, I pushed her to it... all a woman wants is a man who'll be there for her when she needs him... not just when they are horny... Everytime she started talking about all the important things... I always seem to fall asleep... what happened to all those days when I'd be wide awake for about five hours talking to her into early hours of the morning??? Probably that's what this other guy is doing for her... sitting there, talking to her, listening to all her problems and what she did during the day, what she was doing tomorrow, what top she'd just bought, what way she's gonna have her hair done... why can't I be bothered to be interested in all those trival things anymore... Why can't I be the Kelly she first met? The Kelly who picked her up everyday from work, the Kelly who got her, her favourite sandwich, just before he'd pick her from work??? Was she paying for another woman's crime? Or is she just not the one for me?

Should I just finish the whole relationship with Lisa (which I'm not particularly good at)... or just wait around till she fools with this other man and gets caught read handed (nah... that will make me look like a fool)... How do I break up with Lisa without making a mess of things??? I can't keep this up... this fake, you are my girlfriend and I'm messing around behind your back... (well she's messing about too...)

Should I break up with Lisa? (errm...I know thats sounds bad, knowing Valentines is less than a week to go... plus that other guy will be smiling when that happens... probably take her out on Valentine's Day... but then that saves me some money..doesnt it?)
Can someone tell me how to break up with Lisa...without making a mess of things...???

Feb 7, 2005

It's actually a week to Valentines Day, and thoughts of KELLY getting dumped kept on ringing in my head...! I had called Lisa last night... and acted normal, told her about my day with Byron, looked like she was playing the game too, she sounded her normal self. She'd asked me what I did on Saturday, came up with some crap about, going to see a film with some friends... (It would give me some excuse... I was with some friends... to see a film, and maybe I was talking to one of the female ones... I don't remember hugging up Tracy at the cinema's box office nor at the snacks bar. So that will do)... She proceeded in asking me what friends... and I said some friends from work, it was some girl's birthday...) "How come you didn't take me along" She said... "The celebrant was paying for everyone and their was a head count, plus she didn't say we could bring anyone...." I blagged... "Okay...that's cool...how was your day?" She asked... and we talked for a while, then went to bed.

Girls are funny people aren't they. There's this girl that I used to see a while back (before Lisa came along). She told me she wasn't ready for any relationship, because she'd just come out of one which wasn't too good... fair enough... I gave her all the words of love from my fountain of love... and she started liking me (AS IN CALLING ME EVERYDAY KINDA LIKING ME!)... we went out a few times... but I never made no physical moves... There was something about her... looked too innocent...even though she was 19. I stopped calling her the night she'd asked me "What was going on between us..." She wanted us to take the next step (If I remember correctly, she was the one who said she wasn't ready for anything serious... this further shows you girls dont know what they want). Anyway she phoned me recently, and asked why I hadn't called her recently... I said something about me being busy (which was true... I'm always busy during the week...weekend is for socialising), she said she just wanted to find out if she said something or did something wrong... I'm like no..not at all... Don't get me wrong, she was a nice, beautiful girl... She had an amazing and lovely personality... but not enough attitude.. too tame... too easy of a challenge... (plus she had curfews... I can't work with that!!! I love my night times!!!)

Anyway I bumped into her today AND YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT!!! THIS GIRL BLANKED ME... LIKE I DIDN'T EXIST!!!! SHE WALKED PAST ME WITH A FRIEND, STOOD JUST LIKE A METRE AWAY FROM ME, AND SHE DIDNT EVEN LOOK AT ME... I CAN BET SHE SAW ME, BUT WANTED TO ACT LIKE SHE DIDN'T!!! Okay maybe I ran away with her emotions... at least I didn't get physical with her...! doesn't that count for anything!!!????

is it me or is that just plain ol' childish... (THAT'S WHY I STOPPED CALLING HER IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!)

Feb 6, 2005

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday what a VERY DIFFERENT DAY!

I met up with Byron (as usual) to talk and moan. I was driving today, so I wasn't drinking. Byron wasn't so he was having a sour apple martini. I'd filled Byron in on Tracy "Bruv, looks like you having the time of your life..." Not to sound cocky I replied with a smile. "I reckon you'll be caught out real soon..." He added. Come to think about it... I probably would be caught very soon, but I really didn't care if Lisa found out, even though I liked her. I'm wasn't a player or nothing, this would be the first relationship I'd been in, in which I wasn't being faithful, so I wasn't experienced in evading snooping partners. Byron, went on about how he broke it off with his girlfriend... and he's been trying to work a lil' something with some girl, but reckons he's being too "nice" (which women take for granted... and its not a very attractive trait)...WOMEN NEED REAL MEN, NOT DOOR MATS... "Its all about keeping it real" I told him... "Let them know what the deal is and where you stand... don't compromise your standards.... it shows them you have other options" I continued, downing the last of the Red Bull in a gulp. Girls can always know when a girl is desperate... compromising is one of the traits... never compromise! Its all the macho-malakey people shout about... but it works... took me ages to realise this... kissing ass aint what any man should be doing... My phone went off... it was Amy!!!! (AMY!!! after ONE BLIMEY WEEK) I had to keep my cool... "Hi, this is Amy..." She sounded so sultry... "Amy...Amy..Amy... Amy from where?" I couldn't give myself away, that I'd been waiting for her call... "Oh...Amy...from Bar One...how are you" I faked it... "I'm alright... you? She asked... "I'm cool, you?" I was getting so excite now (bearing in mind I'd asked her that before)... but I tried as much as possible to keep it under check... "I'm at some party which is really saying nothing at the moment"... "Is it? where is that?" I asked... "Errm...what area is this?" She asked someone nearby...."Addiscombe...or something like that" She said... "Is it? I'm just round the corner... just seeing a friend at Croydon... you should come down and see me" I lied... I was in Central London!!! Now check the tactic... "you should come down and see me???" why should she come and see me? come on this is Amy.. I'm meant to be drooling and making my way as fast as possible to Addiscombe! but here's the psychology... Children use it a lot... you ask for something very big... push your lucky, you know you'll probably get a no, but when you ask for something smaller, you'll get some sympathy and you wish would be granted, or when you ask for the big thing, the person you asked my suggest the little thing which you had in mind in the first place!!! (Psychology is so good... If I had to choose another career path.... It had to be to become a Shrink!)... She laughed off my proposal in a teasing manner.... "How about you come see me"....Err...I'll be there in second!!! "It's bad enough the party is crap, what will be my point of coming, it has to be worth it!" I was pushing it now... Guys...always push your luck with women, you never know what type of person they are, unless you push it! its better than putting yourself in a strict confine when there is so much you could be doing out there! "I dont know about that...Is seen me not good enough?" She smiled... Of course its good enough... but I still had to push it... I had to show her, I aint no wimp... "You know what, when you make up your mind about what you wanna do... give me a call or something, my friend needs me now..." I said... I came off the phone to her, and I couldn't believe I said that to AMY!!!! neither could Byron believe it when I told her that was Amy... "Don't you think you'be blown it now? she aint gonna call you pompous ass now is she?" He said, still baffled at the way I'd handled the conversation... "Seen" I said... I wasn't even sure about myself... but I had to bluff (Bluffing is good.. sometimes you lose, sometimes you win... If Amy never called....that's some of my ego gone (but it doesn't make me any less Kelly)... but then if she called... that's a lot of WINNING!!! It was a high risk, high return situation!!! Byron and I talked for about 30 mins when my phone went off again... it was Amy! (as you would have guess... I'm I good or what?)..."Please come... I'm bored stiff" She mocked a plea... "So is it gonna be fun?" I asked "Yea...trust me... it will"... She replied... I told herI'll be there when I finished what I was doing... "Don't be long" She said as she came off the phone. Byron's mouth was wide open... he couldn't believe it... "I MEAN!!!!!" he shouted... "I'm turning into a bad man now" He continued "No more Mr Sweet, Nice Gentleman".... Byron was getting the picture now... if you can't beat them... join them... I finished off my conversation with Byron and dropped him off at home, then made my way to see Amy. I went into the party... too many girls, few guy... all the girls seemed please to see a nice guy walk in.... She introduced me to her friends... Even though I didn't know much about Amy herself... She offered me some drinks... I could see from the corner of my eye, virtually all the manz there were screwing... 'Who does he think he is?' Their faces said subtly. Amy and I went to my car to talk... She was impressed with my Metallic grey Audi TT sitting alone under the silhouette of a tree. "That's a nice car... I've always wanted one of those" She rambled on. We got in the car... switched on the engine and let the smooth vibes of the slow jams kick in... you have to keep the atmosphere warm and surreal... all girls dream about stuff like that... it sounds cliche, but its essential in order to get positive results... I complimented about every part of her... her hair, nails, top... giving intricate details, to show I knew my stuff...She was impressed. Women like that as well, a man who knows about "women stuff"...(It helps to just stroll into a women's store, and just look at the current fashion trend.. what colours are in... are styles..., you can also talk to the store attendants...that's what they are paid to do!) We talked for a while... She was quite chatty... most of the time... I was just think..."Can you be quiet for a minute"... "Come here" I said out of the blue... "Where?" She asked smiling... I ran my fingers gently through her hair, to her neck to pull her towards me and kissed her gently on the lips... (GUYS...GENTLE DOES IT!!! DON'T STICK YOUR WHOLE TONGUE DOWN THEIR THROAT, LIKE YOU AINT HAD NONE FOR YEARS, THEY HATE IT....EVEN IF SHE DOES... PUT A FINGER ON HER LIPS... AND CALM HER DOWN... THEN START AGAIN... GENTLE...GENTLE...GENTLE) "I've been waiting to do that, ever since I saw you last week" I whispered... and went back in a another round..until I could hear her breathing faster... then I stopped.... "You such a good kisser..." She said as she stared at my lips with those pretty brown eyes... I wanted to take her there and then but I had to restrain myself... and I collaspe onto the reclined seat.... She rested her head on my bossom... as I stroked her hair... "I'm usually not like this... but there's just something different about you..." She said quietly... Arrggghh not this talk... I've got to get away as soon as possible... "Is it... its the power of the legend" I joked... My phone went off... LUCKY ME!!! it was Louise... I told her previously I was coming over to her place to say hello... "I have to go now...Amy... that was my sister... I was meant to pick her up a hour ago..." I lied... "Oh...when next I'm I seeing you..?" She asked... I felt so guilty... "Call me later tonight yeah..." I kissed her goodbye as she got out of the car and watched her make her way back into the building. I could hear Byron's reaction..."Bruv... that's a lie!"...

I left for Louise place.... which was alright... I didnt do anything with, we just spoke... and watched TV together, and I left just before midnight. I switched on the radio, to listen to Jenny Francis' Slow Down Zone/Dilemma.... when I thought I heard a voice that sounded so familiar... obviously people lie about their real names...but you can't fake your voice... IT WAS LISA!!! "What's you dilemma" Jenny asked.... "Err... I've been with my boyfriend for about two months now... and I think he's cheating..." Lisa replied. She explained how "her boyfriend" (ME!!!!!) always puts her on hold at odd hours of the night, speaking to God knows who.. and he dismisses them as just friends... She'd been hearing stories bout him and to top it all, one of her girlfriends saw say "him" at the cinema with another girl last night!!! I'M NOW OFFICIALLY BUSTED!!! I thought I recognised a face I knew at the cinema... I guess I could always deny... not until she dropped the bomb on me... "The thing is I'm seeing someone else...but I'm being intimate with this other person" Her sexy voice streamed through my car audio speaks... Is it me or did she just say she's seeing someone else... "This other guy is always so nice to me on the phone, he's like my good friend and he tells me how he feels, and how he feels about me... I really like him but I like my boyfriend as well"... I couldn't take it no more... what was I to do... firstly I've been caught.... and secondly... my girl is seeing someone else!!!! I listened to the rest of her dialogue with Jenny... Apparently she'd been seeing this guy for about three weeks... so in effect she started straying before I did!!! but here's the twist... she met him before she met me... STILL!!! you meant to be my girl...!!! Jenny had told her, to confront her boyfriend with this allegations... and not to jump to any conclusions... GO JENNY!!!! There was no way I'd give in to the allegations... not unless she had a picture...!!!

It's all going pear shaped... even though I was flattered with the fact that, Jenny was talking about me!!! (not directly anyway...)

Feb 5, 2005

Today was splendid!

Quick recap, I met this girl called Tracy about two days ago (Thursday)...how I met her... I ran into one of my old female friends (for real... friends! no hanky panky with this one), who had this rather nice friend with her (Tracy), we exchange plesantries.. (nothing special) and that was it. My friend called me later that night to tell me, her friend fancied me, I'm like "Is it?, give her my number and tell her to give me a call"... okay, last night, Tracy gave me a call... around 11pm (crazy time), we got talking, she seemed like a decent girl on the phone....then she popped up the question "Have you got a girlfriend?" hmm... tricky one... never say you aint got a girlfriend...(No woman wants a guy no other woman wants... TRUST ME ON THIS ONE)... come up with some funky story, about how you aint getting on with your girl, or its on and off... or how you had to break up because she had to go work in Australia... to win some sympathy vote... like you'd guessed ...I used the last one (Australia)... She asked me if I still had feelings for her... I'm like yeah... but I'm "almost" over it... thats a challenge for her... can she be the one to get me over her finally? (which I did say to her)... she smiled and said..."We'll see". I asked her what she was doing the following day (Today), she said she was going shopping with her younger sister in the morning but nothing planned in the evening... So I asked if she wanted to meet up... she didn't mind... so I asked her to meet me at Bar One (my favourite bar).

She got to the Bar about 15 mins late, which was perfectly acceptable (women are allowed to be late... slapping that make-up on), nevertheless I made a joke about her being late. THANKS TO HER BEING LATE we couldn't get into the bar because of "health and safety", the place was packed up... GREAT...what a good impression... Thanks to my ability to think on my feet... I suggested we go see a movie at a cinema which was down the road... the last film showing at the cinema started 20 mins ago (which wasn't bad, because the film was over two hours long)... we went in, had a nice time... yeah we did kiss... "Never underestimate the power of Brownsugar"... dropped her off at the station... that was it... I called her about a hour later to find out if she got home safe (Chivalry... always call to find out if they got home well... thanks to Lorraine... my previous ex... she loved her men to exercise chivalry...)... That was about it...

Yeah plus... I went to the barbers... not to shave the bird nest on my head I call my hair, but to get a shape up, funny how a shave up can turn a bird nest into the trendies hip look... been keeping my hair now... got compliments from over five girls now (including Lisa AND TRACY!!!), who say my hair does it for them... SEXY HAIR they call it....

Feb 4, 2005

I'm now an "enlightened" individual, my very good female friend gave me a thorough lecturing on "Chics and Weaves"... Her quote

"19 out of 20 chics you meet will always wear weaves, even white chics and celebrities and even black girls who already have long hair. Weaves are there to make us look nicer, and honestly girls don't enhance their beauty to impress you guys,but actually to impress other females. Also we don't always weave our whole heads but just add in extra pieces to make our hair look fuller and healthier. Weaves are also used to protect our real hair underneath, protecting it from the weather, lots of hair creams or hot appliances like blow dryers or tongs - at the end of the day, weaves are very useful and they have a purpose, in case you weren't aware, provided the weave isn't falling of our heads and it looks good and so far as it matches our complexion, I really dont see what the problem is and besides girls have fake hair, guys deceive us with their fake lifestyles like flashy cars that belong to their great uncles and stolen credit cards, so hey! Everyone's frontin' You know I'm very analytical!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Thank you very much for being "analytical", so now I, being a very analytical person myself (thanks to three years of Computer Science!!!), will analyze your views on "Chics and Weaves"... (I love that theme... sounds like a bad black comedy by the Wayan Brothers)

Here we go... 19 out of 20 chics!!! that scares the shit out of me.... i best be looking for that remaining one... okay fair enough celebrities like Beyonce wear weaves, but their wear the RIGHT ONES!!! the NOT-SO-BAIT ONES... Beyonce spends at least £3,000 on her weave, and you spend err.... £50 and you complaining... obviously the difference will be clear. If you've got a weave, don't make it bait... like some funky shade of black or brown which doesnt exactly match your skin colour.Good... weaves make you look nicer... hmm..maybe on Beyonce, Ashanti, Christia Milian (SHE'S SO BUFF!!!!) but not on your average girl walking down the street. And what's this about you wear weaves not to impress guys but to impress other females... YOU IMPRESS OTHER GIRLS WITH SOMETHING THEY CAN TELL IT'S FAKE??? (Maybe I should get myself one)... you know you can't impress guys, because we hate it... and I'm sure other girls, are just waiting to rip it off your head so as to make fun of you! (Good joke: Hey girl... dont make me rip that thing off you head... HA HA HA)
"at the end of the day, weaves are very useful"....errr... of course they are useful...ON THE POOR HORSE'S BODY...!!!! KEEPING THE POOR THING WARM!

Okay guys have fake flashy cars and stolen credit cards... COOL... ERR....LETS SEE, THE FLASHY CARS GETS RATING FROM YOUR GIRLFRIENDS, GETS YOU FROM YOUR HOUSE TO THE CINEMA, STOPS THE RAIN FROM BEATING YOUR POOR WEAVE, THE CREDIT CARD PAID FOR THE WEAVE IN THE FIRST PLACE, PAID FOR THOSE NICE LITTLE THINGS TO BRAG TO YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ABOUT...AND AT LEAST THEY ARE USEFUL TO YOU... BUT THE WEAVE... WHAT DOES IT DO FOR THE GUY APART FROM MAKING HIM THE LAUGHING STOCK OF HIS FRIENDS...AND MAYBE CHOKING HIM WHILE TRYING TO GET SOME LUVIN'

....It's all love though.... Ladies...don't make my views an excuse for you not giving me your number when I ask you it...

XXX

....AMY CALL ME!!!! (HOPE THAT THICK LONG HAIR OF YOUR AIN'T A WEAVE... COULDN'T TELL BECAUSE WE WERE IN THE DARK...)

Feb 3, 2005

Woke up this morning with the strangest feeling, remembered some girl I used to love off when I was in college (some odd four years ago!!!). It's kinda funny the way you like someone and just watch them from the shadows without being able to walk up to them and tell them how you feel. We've all been guilty of this act of weakness/fear whichever you wanna call it at some point in our lives. Why are we so scared of being rejected? Why can't we humans be optimistic and assume he/she will say, "Oh, that's good, I fancy you too" but I suppose we are trained to always prepare for the worst. The most memorable day I shared with this girl was... in a library (great! how romantic), I was having a chat with the librarian, then she walked up to the librarian and pointed out the fact that the "Please be quiet" notification on the walls were spelt wrong. The librarian had written "Please be quite", and the librarian... (some poor old git) was arguing the word 'quiet' was spelt right... and she asked for my opinion... dont ask me how... and why, but I said it was spelt right... and she was like no... its not and some few seconds later, it dawned on me that it was actually spelt wrong... WHAT A GREAT IMPRESSION!!!... "What a twat! can't even spell the word quiet!" She must have thought. How come I couldn't come up with some cheesy line like "Actually, it was a set up I had with the librarian just to get a buff intelligent girl like you to come up here and talk to me"... at least she would have smiled...
I can still remember her name, Tina, she had a distinctive scar/birth mark on her right or left cheek (can't remember which one), thick kissable lips and had this guy who played basketball for the college all following her around (I think they family friends...should I say I hoped they were)... she also had a lil' brother... (SEE THAT'S HOW MUCH STALKING YOU DO FROM THE SHADOWS WHEN YOU LIKE SOMEONE BUT NOT BOLD ENOUGH TO TELL THEM)... saw her like a few months after we finished college, at the cinema... (she came with some other people, including her little brother)... didn't have the nerves to go up to her and say... "How are you, what are you doing now?" Anyways that was time ago, I won't be so naive to make that mistake again... If you see something you like, go for it! Dont hesitate (NEVER)... I remember going to a party, saw this nice girl, was having a chat with her, until my friend came along and joined in the conversation, and he popped up the question "Can I have your number", with much persuasion from him, he got the number, and he's getting a lil' sum'um now... and I keep thinking to myself... "Hmm.... that could have been me"... Trust me that's not a situation you wanna be in!

I'm well stressed, got so much work to do at work! It will be alright though... (I hope). Guess who phoned me at work today.... Louise, just finding out how I've been and slipped in a compliment about the other night being great! (Right... cut the crap and ask when next I wanna meet up). She wants to meet up this weekend, I told her I'll get back to her.... Still dont know what I'm doing this weekend, maybe I could squeeze her in... (I know I'm going against my word...but lets see what happens)