Sunday, November 26, 2006

The Icebox diaries

The icebox diaries is based on TRUE EVENTS, so don't be suprised by some of the things you will see in forthcoming posts, this is why i haven't really been in the swing of blogging for a while, i've just been living and experiencing things, i guess u cant really know where u are going until you know where you are coming from. Dudes, i've been places, now is the time for me to tell the story....heheheahaaha(rubs hands together).

After my long period of suffering from the ugly 'ONE-ITIS' i finally "patched" things up with Sasha. For a long time i was being cold with her, not answering her calls, text messages or emails(ok maybe she didnt go as far as emailing me). I finally got to a stage where i kept trying to clear her out of my head and flush every ounce of emotional feeling i had for her, it worked out alright. .But you are probably wondering why i was like this towards her. Ok, here's the deal. She is beautiful, and when i say beautiful, im talking literally CHOONG!, Sasha is one of the most prettiest girls i've dated. Note, i said 'dated', which means no committment right? Ok, this is where the problem lies. Shes a pretty girl, im a fine ass brother sounds good right? hmmm...well not good enough. In uni, she's miss hot thang, all the brothers want her etc. But does that mean i should feel privelaged by getting her to the level where i have gotten her to?(Phase two of the butterfly love theory...see previous posts) She speaks to a lot of guys.....ok a lot more than 'a lot' and i find this funny. Now, the main issue is trust, i dont think i can ever trust this girl and that is a problem, she trusts me, but i dont trust her, funny aint it? Now we have come such a long way for things to all go pear shaped. I must admit, this is the most messed up situation i've gotten myself into in a very long time. So its a thing where, if i can't trust you, what's the point?
I told Sasha that i wish we could be closer but the relationship she has with her 'best friend' (who is also MY friend, and is also a MALE) WILL make that very very difficult. And i have come to the conclusion that i can never compromise my levels/standards. No matter how much i try to accept the fact that she talks to a lot of guys, it wont change the fact that i can never move things forward with a girl like that, i dont care what the situation is. So.....whats the solution?....there isn't one, i can completly shut her off, but i'd be kidding myself because i like her being around, i can show her love and attention but that will compromise my mentality of being ME...because some next 'badboy' can come along and snatch what i've built with hard work...lol...so........

....well my next step is to act. It sounds crude and sinitser but its my way or the highway now. I told her i trust her so much more(but i feel the exact opposite) and told her that i have a problem with the fact that she talks to other guys and by her talking to other guys creates barrier to the level me and her can reach with eachother, it's the only way, so i guess i'm showing her from now so she's not suprised when she finds out im seeing someone else because i got fed up and found someone better. ;-) .....Sahsa aint going anywhere for now.

The IceBox diaries begin. Stay Locked

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Why say yes in the first place?

I really have to know if it’s me or happens to everyone in general. Have you ever had that one girl you met and you were so excited about, next thing you talking on the phone and you ask her out (agree to meet up to do some fun activity… no! it’s not what you think). You didn’t force her or pressure her into it… easily and freely she says “Yes, I’d love to.” You come off the phone thinking to yourself… “Wow! Is this really me…? I’m going to see her this weekend… YES!!!” Depending on what day you ask her out (preferable Wednesday… to go out during the weekend…. Monday means, you’ve put too much thought into it…. Friday means… it’s a booty call… Wednesday is just perfect). Thursday and Friday come, and you cant stop thinking about seeing her on Saturday… you’ve told your mates you’ve got this fantastic date on Saturday.
Saturday afternoon, you’ve just got your car washed, feeling happy and proud (or gone down to the corner shop to get your bus pass/travel card if you not so mobile). Saturday evening… just when you are about to jump into the shower… you get that text message… your heart skips a bit… normally you are excited to get text messages right? You open it and see her name… you swallow hard… you know what’s in there… you know what she’s about to tell you… you’ve got no choice now… you have to open it (well you can delete it…).

“I’m so sorry, I can’t make it tonight… [I have to do something for my mom I’m still at work I’m feeling a bit sick I’ve just got back from work, and I’m so tired].”

Well… you’ve just being flaked! Here’s the hardest part… what do you do after you receive that text? Ignore it and never mention it? Call her and try to persuade her? Text her back and tell her off for ruining your weekend? Empathize with her? Try to get the next date?

To be honest with you, I don’t have the right answer… when this happens to me… I’ve done all of the above… I’d like to know what the right answer is though because it’s really annoying. Correct me if I’m wrong… but if a girl was really into you and really like you and wanted to see you… she’d make every effort to see you… I’m only left to try to explain things from my point of view…. It’s something I’ve done myself… I’ve flaked a few girls myself… and I’ve never had a genuine reason for flaking her… it’s usually because… something better had come up… a party somewhere (where there’s a possibility of meeting someone better), someone else to go out with, just wasn’t into seeing her as much as I did when I asked her out… As far as I’m concerned, there’s no good reason to flake someone out… not unless, you are sitting on a hospital bed!

If she doesn’t suggest another time, then she really wasn’t into meeting up with you! But back my original question… why say “Yes” in the first place?

Can anyone woman answer this question?

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

ONE-ITIS

ONE-ITIS

One-itis is a natural thing that most guy succomb to. As in The dreaded "One-Itis," otherwise known as the ailment of liking that "One Special Girl" and wanting her more than any other woman on earth. A want so intense, that it's actually painful. Here it is, you put your all in one girl, dying down every other girl in your life just because ur scared to lose this girl, but this girl might not even like u as much as u think she does or as much as u like her....and shes probably got some male 'special friend' that shes always with, but ur instincts always tell u that they might av a thing going on but u just die down ur insecurities and drive past ur instincts...so later on as time goes by....you discover that you have been wasting ur time all along trying everything with this one special lady because all along she has been seeing other guys because(its not in the contract that she stays exclusive to you because you are not officilally going out) .

But my point is id rather be single than suffer from 'one-itis' and get played for a fool by a girl, because if i dont stay single im always gona have a mentality that everygirl that comes along can be a potential 'player' so i will NEVER take her seriously. Sounds harsh but i guess it's just a defence mechanism after suffering from such an illness. In fact, the funny thing, is that some guys actually love the feeling(once they are in it) becuase they feel that they are in total control, but on the outside, everyone else can see what is happening, your boys, your friends, even your female friends.

Guys leave comments if you've ever suffered from this, girls mind find it a bit 'controversial' as some felame friends don't see why it's an illness, but let's see what the fellas have to say about it.

Peace, Peace and Piece.

Raheem

Monday, November 06, 2006

First Dates/Job Interviews



I wise man once said to me... That "Dating is like an employer who is seeking a specialist employee, you are looking for the right candidate so you take as many cv's and offer as many jobe interviews as time constraints will allow hoping that amongst the rabble you will find the piece of gold that seems to elude the common man." Okay it was only Rafael but that is neither here nor there...

Now this is seemingly simple, but then job interviews aren't first dates are they. With one person coordinating whilst the other desperately tries to impress. At least I hope so otherwise I have been going desperately wrong.

You see I had a series of first dates in the last week, and due to my over critical mind i analysed each after in order to measure the response that I got, most importantly a second date.

First we have a Tamara, a well educated, middle class sweet and pretty girl who suffered from a "Daddy's Little Girl Complex". We ended up at this lovely restaurant in Surrey Called Indiya Indiya, it's quite discreet so it offered the required level of intimacy for two people who were just getting to know each other. She was a genuine intellect, all her hours of being protected by daddy had obviously had at least one positive effect besides her obvious insecurities and tendency to giggle unnecessarily. She offered good company, reliabilty and the opportunity to engage in real conversation with a female and not a cover for the underlying sexual tension nor the needless niceties that go hand in hand with co-gender friendships. We'll come back to her later.

Hailey was an old acquaintance who if i'm honest had originally intended on being a sexual conquest due to her over inflated ego and her model 10 looks. Conversation was stale, she was not interested in anything beyond her own nose and was flirtacious in a somewhat routine and adolescent way. Her tactics consisted of poking me and expecting me to poke her back, trying to spoon feed me hot soup and repeatedly asking me my opinion of her. Now what I had hoped would be a dream come true was in fact best staying a dream. I started rejecting her calls and messages as soon as we left Thalay Thay.

Lastly we have the spontaneously combustible Dior, now with a name like that you would envison a demure, classy, cute lady. Heck No! She was abrupt as a hot iron on a cold winters night pressed flat on your extremities. She was sexualy aggressive, had a crude sense of humour and I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT. Her crass behaviour was inflicted on random passers by as we sat at our picnic in Hyde Park, even going as far to begin an impromptu karaoke style rendition of "Killing Me Softly" on the South Bank opposite the National Film Theatre which I recommend to to any budding film enthusiast.

Now how do these girls fall into the employers category, Dior is the bright individual who you can only take in short bursts so you hire her on contract and keep her number in case that she may be of help in the future, Hailey; you laugh at yourself for inviting her to interview and bin her cv whilst you offer Tamara a full-time position and invite her to dine with the Board Of Executives.

That's what I had hoped but apparently she was the interviewee on that date and she decided to hire me on a contract. LOVELY!!!

As it stands Dior and I are going out for part two tomorrow evening.

Merci Vraiment

Metrosexuality