Two coffees, one apple tart and an answer to my question please?

I sat right across her gazing into her loving brown eyes. They stared back at me… it was sometimes hard to say what was going on it her mind. She slowing moved the straying strand of her which had lay across her beautiful face. I knew I liked her... I liked her in a different way… I liked her in a way I believe I would like to like a girlfriend. Not so much in a sexual way but in aesthetic way. Beauty is defined by symmetry and her face exuded symmetry. Everything about her was in symmetry. The positioning of her eyes, nose, mouth, ears, hair, her breasts, legs, feet… every single part of her was symmetrical. After a long pause of her staring at me… her lips finally parted, in slow and orchestrated manner…
“I couldn’t be with someone like you.” She said. Eyes still affixed on my eyes.
“You’d wonder why…” she continued. I dared not to interrupt her… she was on a roll.

“Don’t get me wrong, I really like you as a person, you are so sweet, so cute…” She managed a smile. Ahh… not the cute word again. So why couldn’t she be with me?

“You seem like the kind of guy who is into a girl today and the next day you get bored and just decide to leave…” the smile had disappeared again.

Freeze frame… everything around me seemed to grind to a halt… she wasn’t moving, the music in the coffee shop had stopped, the waiter who had a cup of what could have been coffee or tea and some muffins had stopped right there in his tracks… it was truly a freeze frame… what was happening? Was I going crazy… was I still alive…

I was suddenly flung back to the previous day… I could see myself… there she was right next to me looking ever so charming. I was right behind her as she introduced me to her friend… I remembered this happening yesterday but I couldn’t remember a single word that was said yesterday… Her friend smiled at me and walked away after the introduction. Next thing I was sitting next to her friend… she was so damn sexy… she wasn’t the prettiest girl in the world… but like I say there are three types of women… the beautiful women, the ugly women and the women who just know how to turn a man’s switches… doesn’t matter if they are pretty or not! I observed myself… the way I looked into her friend’s eyes… the way she stared back… the way she playfully hit me and smiled… the way I reciprocated… what was I doing… the scene changed very quickly again… I was seated on the couch… and her friend walked through the door… looked at me seductively… as if to say… “I know you are looking at me and I know what you are thinking…” she looked away again… and just as she was about to exit the room… she looked at me again… she had me by the crotch… I was entranced by her female wiles. Even though she wasn’t my girl… I had no excuse to fool around with her friend… The scene changed again… I was in my car… in was cooler now… the cold air from the a.c. caressed my skin… that was when I realised I was myself again… but hold on… I was still in yesterday… her friend seated next to me… was this my chance to rewrite history? Her friend looked her me… just the way she had been looking at me in the sandwich bar… “Why are you doing this?” she asked. Doing what? Like she read my mind… “You want me don’t you…?” Of course I wanted her… but was it worth it? Could I face the ramifications… then I realised what had happened yesterday…

The waiter was moving again… the music was back on… and she sniffed… “I’m sure you know what I’m talking about… Kelly…” she said, this time looking out of the window. The scary thing was I felt it was true…
What happened to Louise? Amy? Lisa? Claire and most important Karen, who I had told my friends was a serious contender to be my next missus… did my best with Karen… showed her I was into her… that night when she was in my car… my fingers slowing moving through hers… hers travelling across mine as well… it was at that moment, I knew I didn’t like her… I only pursued her because she was difficult… I never connected her with… but yet I believed I could make her mine… now I cant be asked to even call her anymore… looking back in retrospect… I’m glad it never worked… because if she’d liked me and was in a relationship with me… I’d probably not be into her anymore… she’d replaced by Charlene… who I had met yesterday… I knew Charlene wasn’t my type… she was a socialite… but there was something about her that got me drawn into her… she was a nice face and a posh accent… I asked her to come out for a meal this weekend…. Still waiting for a reply… (Why do I do this to myself?)

“Why do you put yourself through this?” her voice brought me back to reality… I couldn’t answer her… because I couldn’t even answer myself…Why do I put myself through this? I looked into her eyes which seemed to be searching for an answer in mine….
“At least now you know why we can’t be…” she said again and she started to gather her things into her bag. First was her mobile phone, then her purse and finally the Cadbury’s crème egg I had bought her on my way down to see her. I was still lost for words… It had just dawned on me I hadn’t said a word in the last ten minutes… and I knew I had to say something…
“What if I changed?” I eventually muttered.
“Then you wouldn’t be Kelly anymore…” she said as she motioned towards the door. I wanted to say something… something to bring her back… but there was no point in holding her back… I liked her… I wouldn’t want to ruin me liking her… I could have told her I would change things… told her all she said wasn’t true… told her it was all in her head… but at the end of the day…there was something I need to do…

Find out why I had such a short attention span…

She was now gone… all that was left of her was her sweet fragrance… and a burning question on my mind…